The "Go-Bag" Adventure: Empowering Your Child And Reducing Anxiety Through Preparation

(This blog post is the second post in a series regarding physical safety and psychological well-being of our children during unexpected or special circumstances.)

Imagine this: You receive a call about a family emergency regarding quick travel; or a severe storm warning goes off on your electronic devices and it instructs you to seek safety or “take cover now”; or there is an evacuation order in your neighborhood or community due to flooding or a nearby disaster. Sirens may be wailing, police, fire and EMS may be racing by your home.

These types of incidents can be anxiety provoking for all of us, but particularly for our children who can sense your anxiety but may or may not completely understand the situation.

In those frantic moments, having a prepped "go-bag" for your child can make all the difference. As a licensed child psychologist, I've seen firsthand how children may have anxiety regarding “bad things” happening, including emergencies, floods, tornados, fires and “intruders”.

This blog post does NOT deal with what to do if there is a possible “intruder”. But “intruder lock down drills” are a necessity now in our schools and can be a significant source of anxiety in our children. Actions are significantly different in this situation.

Preparation, if handled correctly, can significantly ease anxiety and empower children in the face of emergencies.

This isn't about scaring our kids; it's about equipping them with a sense of security and control. Creating an emergency go-bag together is a fantastic way to do just that. It transforms a potentially overwhelming concept into a manageable, even fun, activity.

Here's how to approach it with your young child, focusing on their developmental needs and emotional well-being:

1. Start the Conversation, Not the Scare:

Choose a calm moment: Don't bring this up during an actual emergency or when your child is already anxious. Pick a time when they're relaxed and receptive.

Keep it positive and practical: With my granddaughters, ages 5 and 6, we call it their “Girl Hiking Bag”. You might frame it as an "Adventure Bag" or a "Hurry Bag". With older children you may call it their “Go Bag” or “Safety Bag”. The goal in having a great name for the bag is that it helps them feel ready for anything.

Emphasize in developmentally appropriate words that times to “grab” their bag won't happen very often but being prepared is smart.

Explain based on their age and development that you will tell them: 

• if they need to “grab” their special bag and
• teach them about different times when everyone should “grab” their special bag “just in case”.

Use age-appropriate language:

Younger children (4-7): "This is your special bag if we need to go somewhere quickly and safely, like a little adventure!"

Middle age children (8-11): "Sometimes unexpected things happen, like big storms or if we need to leave our house for a little while. This bag helps you stay safe and comfortable. We are all going to have one!

Pre-teens/Teens (12+): Focus on self-reliance and the importance of having ESSENTIAL items. Based on what you've already taught them; their essential items may be more individualized. What they may need most reminded of is WEIGHT. “If we have to leave, we can buy what we don't have with us.”

2. The Bag Itself: Ownership and Choice

Let them choose the bag: A separate backpack the same size or slightly larger than a school book bag is ideal. (Don't use the same bag they use for school and make sure it's a different color.) Allowing them to pick out a color or design they like immediately gives them ownership.

Make it their own: If they want to put a fun keychain on it, or put their first name or draw a picture on a tag, let them! This makes it feel less like a chore and more like their special safety item.

Keep it accessible to them: Store the go-bag in a place they can easily reach, like their closet or under their bed.

3. What Goes Inside? The "Comfort & Calm" Edition

This is where the child psychologist in me really focuses. Beyond these standard emergency items, consider some small additions to support your child's emotional well-being:

The Basics (The "Must-Haves") Think 24 hours; think about weather; and MAKE SURE THEY CAN CARRY IT EASILY:

Water: Most bags this size have a water bottle pocket on one side. Get them an extra water bottle (most kids have one for school and everyday use) that always stays in the “go-bag” pocket.

Non-perishable snacks: Get 3-4 child appropriate easy-to-open, and high-energy food bars. (They don't need MRE's!). Allow them to pick something that they like. Put them in a small freezer bag. Allow your child to choose where to put it in the bag with your guidance. If the bag has an outside or top pocket, it might be the best place for access. (Make sure their choices won't melt and check the expiration date. Most last about six months.)  YOU change the expired items when it's time, but make sure they match your child's choices.

Very small First-aid kit: Even young children know about this. Band-Aids, antiseptic wipes – explain what each item is for.

Flashlight and extra batteries: This is an essential item to reduce fear. Let them practice turning it on and off. (You carry the extra batteries if your child is young.)

Whistle: This is an essential item for safety and rescue. It is for signaling for help. Teach them three blows on the whistle means “Help”. (Seriously, it means SOS.) Tell them if they “need help” or “don't see me”, “blow 3 times”, count to 5, then “do it again”.

Emergency blanket: A lightweight space blanket is considered an essential item. My granddaughters’ are Orange. (Easier to see). “Orange on the outside/silver on the inside on you keeps you warm.” This can be a significant comfort to a child. A fear of “being cold” is common.

Change of clothes: Keep it simple. ONE outfit, (long pants and long sleeves are preferable) including socks and underwear. Add a light fleece vest/jacket (depending on the season or if you live in Michigan) and (this is important) a rain jacket with a hood.

Footwear: Don't put shoes in the bag. They will likely make the bag too heavy.

• Wear the shoes they have on (if the criteria below is met) or
• Make sure they have EXTRA easy on shoes WITH their bag (closed toes and that cover the heel e.g. “velcro secured” or “slip on” tennis shoes/sneakers are a good choice). Comfort and movement, not fashion, is crucial with footwear.

Important documents: Identification that your child is yours! Birth certificate (COPY), your complete contact information and a note regarding any medical needs of your child. (Keep these in a waterproof bag in their “go- bag”.)

Small amount of cash: (This may be a careful decision by you on a child-to-child basis.) Most young children understand the concept that money has value and some can count it. So a few one dollar bills (up to 10 dollars) may help your child feel responsible.  “Tweens+”, if responsible, may be able to carry a bit more cash.

Wipes/hand sanitizer: A small travel size pack of “wet wipes” (no alcohol) can be useful for toileting needs and even a quick “wash off”. And most kids know that hand sanitizer can be used to clean their hands. (They use it in preschools and schools.)

The "Comfort & Connection" Items (Crucial for Mental Well-being):

• A special small stuffed animal or toy for children or a special small memento for “tweens+”: This can be a familiar and significant comfort in an unfamiliar situation. (Both of my granddaughters have small stuffed “hedgehogs” that they love.)
• A family photo: A visual reminder of loved ones reminds children of the security of their family. (Put it in small plastic bag.)
• A special book or small coloring book/notepad and a few small crayons/pencil: This simple add-in can provide distraction and a sense of normalcy. For “tweens+”, a paperback reading level appropriate book might replace the crayons. They pick.
• A small, portable game: This can engage their minds and create a sense of routine. Miniature versions of family games are often available such as “Uno”. (Keep it small and very lightweight. You don't need to buy an extra “Switch” and it may run out of power.)
• A note or drawing from you: Based on age, a handwritten message/drawing expressing your love and reassurance can be incredibly powerful. “You are brave. We are safe. I love you!"
• Special dietary needs/medications: If your child is young, this is simple, these items stay with you. With “tweens+”, YOU need to decide if they are responsible enough and can use them correctly.

4. The "Practice" Run: Build Confidence:

Review the bag together periodically: Make it a quarterly activity. This helps them remember what's inside and provides an opportunity to rotate items (like snacks with expiration dates).

Practice grabbing the bag: In a low-stress environment, have them practice grabbing their bag, (if necessary, putting on their extra shoes and tell them “don't worry about socks”) and meeting you at a designated safe spot (e.g., "Let's pretend the TV tells us there's a big storm and we have to go to the basement!"). MAKE IT LIKE A GAME.

Another really good way to practice use of their “go-bag” is to carry it during a fun trail hike. This provides assurance that the bag is a part of normal family life. It also tests whether they can carry the bag easily for a longer period of time. (Back home, replace any items used and make sure it is returned to its special location.)

Talk through scenarios: "If we had to leave quickly, what would you do first?" This helps them mentally rehearse.

5. The Emotional Payoff: Reduced Anxiety, Increased Resilience:

By involving your child in creating their emergency go-bag, you're not just preparing for a physical event; you're nurturing their emotional resilience.

Reduced anxiety: Knowing they have a plan and personal items can significantly lower anxiety during an emergency.

Sense of control: When events feel chaotic, having control over a small part of the situation (their go-bag) is empowering.

Increased confidence: They learn that they are capable of handling unexpected situations.

Strengthened family bonds: This collaborative family activity reinforces that you are a team, working together for safety.

Remember, the goal is not to instill increased anxiety and fear, but to encourage a sense of preparedness and calm.  The message is: “We've got this!”

By following the steps above (as the nurturing and loving parent you are) your child's emergency go-bag isn't just a collection of items; it's a tangible symbol of security, love, and their incredible capacity for resilience.

As always, if I can be of assistance, please reach out.

Dr. M